May 2012
2 tags
The Best Thing Happened To Me Today In Math Class
fiddlesticksandcustard:
We had a substitute for Math because my actual teacher had personal business to attend to. We weren’t doing much, just some little project, and today it was storming in Texas. So this enormous clap of thunder shakes the walls and everybody starts screaming. Then I look over at the teacher’s desk to see our substitute standing up from his chair and shouting, “Shut up Thor!...
“FINALLY, I can link my Facebook account to my Tumblr account so all my friends...”
– No one, ever.
“This is probably going to get quoted in every publication just because I said...”
– Robert Downey Jr.
captainrenner:
RENNER SPELLED BACKWARDS IS STILL RENNER
1 tag
funeralfrost:
Tim Burton should just make a movie called ‘Johnny Depp’.
patronustrip:
ccolfer:
here in new york city, our taxis drive backwards
Glee.
thorhead:
can you imagine ancient egyptian spelling bees though
“spell mummified”
“eye fish eye eye bird squiggle bird cat circle”
“are you high”
rubywhiterabbit:
My little brother got into outer space and stuff so my step-mom bought him a place mat with all the planets on it. When I first saw it, I was upset, because it was newer and so Pluto wasn’t labeled. I was about to say something when I noticed something…
Pluto is there.
The artist remembered Pluto.
Guys…
The artist drew Pluto crying.
sneadly:
WHY ARE BOOKS NOT WATERPROOF
I WANT TO READ IN THE SHOWER
3 tags
textposter2:
if you’re ever mugged by someone just scream ‘sWIPER NO SWIPING’ at them and by the rules of crime they have to stop
me in the morning: i'm tired don't look at me
me at school: i'm tired don't touch me
me after school: i'm tired don't talk to me
me blogging at 3 in the morning: hey guys i have so much energy who wants to swim to africa and back?
me: *walks out of room*
parents: the bat emerges from her cave
me: *gets food. goes back in room*
fear-god-alone:
iboughtafuckinggateau:
Have you ever noticed how horrifying those smiley french fries are in groups?
they’re like
you’re burning us alive
our insides are melting
hELP US
PLEASE DON’T KILL ME.
Those days when you just feel like a dinosaur.
richwhitelesbian:
how weird would it be if whales didnt need to live in the ocean and they just dragged themselves along the ground and we had to deal with whales just meandering around everywhere
The 'yes or no' game.
itsalovetypething:
You can ask me anything and I’ll answer honestly, but only with yes and no.
So..
tuff-park-ranger:
ne-yo:
Does Canada even have a president or is it just whichever moose has the strongest antlers
oh my god
A fact to make you feel old: Monsters Inc. was released 11 years ago.
sincerelyjustme:
I love how in every Avengers fic I read, even if it takes place after the movie,
Coulson is always there.
Just there.
Like the entire fandom plugged their ears and screamed “LA LA LA LA LA WE CAN’T HEAR YOU” when he died.
And this is a good thing.
For when you decide you no longer want to be a...
How I want to be cheered up if I'm down.
egifany:
